SuburbanDaddy

I read an interesting article that suggests parents are less likely to report being happy than the childless.

In Daniel Gilbert’s 2006 book “Stumbling on Happiness,” the Harvard professor of psychology looks at several studies and concludes that marital satisfaction decreases dramatically after the birth of the first child—and increases only when the last child has left home.

No group of parents—married, single, step or even empty nest—reported significantly greater emotional well-being than people who never had children. It’s such a counterintuitive finding because we have these cultural beliefs that children are the key to happiness and a healthy life, and they’re not

I’m not sure how to take these results. I suppose it’s up to the individual. Certainly, anyone who wants to have kids but can’t for whatever reason, won’t be very happy.

I can also see how people with kids are subjected to stresses - money, time, sleep - that the childless are not. If stress level is the measure of happiness, then kids aren’t going to help that measure.

To borrow from William Jefferson Clinton, it depends on what the meaning of the word happy is.

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I probably should not be telling this story. There are some things we are better off not knowing. I don’t need to know how hotdogs are made. They just taste so good. And I don’t want to hear about what happens in restaurant kitchens. I just want to enjoy a meal out.

After taking Thing 1 and Thing 2 to the pool in the morning, I thought we’d go by this new Burger King with the biggest, two story play place I’ve ever seen. After which, they would surely be wiped out and the rest of my Saturday would be easy.

This play place had 4 levels of tunnels, slides, and climbing. There was actually a sign that said maximum capacity was 215 people! Surely that can’t be right. The Things were loving it. They played for almost 30 minutes before deciding it was time to eat.

[Read more →]

In a recent post, I tried to convey a typical conversation with Thing 2 while driving home from preschool. As promised, I put the daddy cam in my car one day, so you can see first hand.

It’s actually surprising how well the video came out, considering I was holding the camera with one and and driving with the other. Don’t try this at home.

What would a first birthday be without the “first cake” ritual? In this case it was a cupcake, but the end result is the same.

Happy Birthday Thing 3!

When I was a kid, we didn’t wear bike helmets. No one did. I don’t even remember seeing bike helmets sold in stores. We also didn’t wear seat belts in cars. We were idiots.

Today I wear a seat belt and use a bike helmet. It never would occur to my kids that people don’t do both of these, all the time. And that’s a good thing. But there are still non-believers out there, I guess.

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Thing 3 got a birthday present in the mail. It was a fairly large sized box, and the Things were very, very excited. And very eager to “help” their one year old brother play with his new toy.

This isn’t like Christmas, where each Thing has their own presents to keep them occupied. This is a feeding frenzy. It’s survival of the fittest. The Things are climbing over each other, trying to get to the front so they can see what’s in the box. They are grabbing, pushing, and, in Thing 3’s case, crawling to get on top. [Read more →]

Dads are used to being the Rodney Dangerfield of parents. We don’t get no respect. Our culture is filled with reminders like Parenting Magazine’s tagline: “What matters to moms”.

Father’s Day provides the ultimate salt in the wound. BusinessWeek reports that in 2005, consumers spent $11 billion on Mother’s Day vs $8 billion on Father’s Day.

Take a guess when is the busiest collect call day of the year. Yup, we make dads foot the bill to talk to their kids on Father’s Day.

Personally, I don’t need or expect a big production on Father’s Day. Just let me stay in bed until 7am, eat my meals sitting down at a table, and let me watch the last hour of the U.S. Golf Open.

I suspect most of my audience will vote for “Equal” in the poll. I also expect there will be some, probably the dads, who say Mother’s Day is the bigger holiday. I doubt there will be any votes for Father’s Day as the bigger holiday.

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Each day I pick up the Things at preschool/daycare and the ride home is no more than 15 minutes, but the conversations are priceless. Thing 2 is very excited to tell me about his day. Any random thought that pops into his head is expressed.

Every sentence starts the same way with “Daddy. Daddy. Daddy.” He will keep saying “Daddy” until I acknowledge him with either a “yes”, or by turning around to look at him.

Today, I tried not responding just to see how many times he would say my name. I counted 9 Daddy’s before I finally said “yes”. To get an idea what that is like, say this out loud: Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy. Now do that for 15 minutes, the length of our ride.

Here is the gist of our conversation today. [Read more →]