Watching this dimly lit scene between Thing 1 and Thing 2 made me flash forward about a dozen years. I started to picture an innocent, teenage Thing 2, getting a lesson from his big brother on how to “take a hit”.
Then the image in my mind unraveled further, to Thing 2 hanging around all day in his sweatpants, no shirt, in a dorm room somewhere, smoking pot all day. Good thing they are only in preschool and I don’t have to worry about it yet.
Here’s what was really going on:
Thing 1 and I were at a window table at Starbucks.? He was enjoying his chocolate milk and cookie.? I had my blueberry muffin and grande green tea.? We were watching the cars in the busy parking lot go by, as the first snow of the year came down.? I guess it was a reflective moment in the mind of a four year old.? Out of the blue he remarks:
“There are too many girls in the world.? We need more boys.”
Then he took a sip of his chocolate milk.
By “world”, I think he was referring to his pre-school class, which happens to have more girls than boys.?
Thing 2 often wakes up in the middle of the night, stands up in his crib, and cries until someone comes to his room. As soon as we leave the room, he starts again, until we usually break down and take him into our bed so we can get some sleep. Recently, we decided this pattern has to stop, so we let him “cry it out” one night. For two hours. When I went to get him in the morning, this is what he cheerfully said:
Thing 2: There’s no piggy!
It took until after breakfast for me to realize what he meant. A couple of months ago we went to a fall festival at a farm. They had tractor rides, pumpkins, a petting zoo, and two of the absolutely biggest pigs you’ve ever seen. There were also pig races.
Thing 2 loves animals , especially farm animals, as long as they are toys or on TV. In real life, he is terrified of dogs, cats, squirrels, birds, cows, and, yes, pigs. For several days after the trip, he kept saying “The piggies are going to get me!” when we went into the garage or basement. And I would tell him “There’s no piggy”.
Incredibly, after this one cry-it-out-for-two-hours episode, he no longer screams during the night.? I guess he just needed to make it through the night once without the pig getting him.
Thing 1 just turned four. I go back and forth on whether the time has gone by fast or not. In some ways, it has been a blur, and I remember clearly when there was just one Thing and that was about all I could possibly handle. Now there are three of them, and I probably handle better than I did back then. Then, there are times 4 years seems like a very, very long time, and I can’t even remember what it was like before kids. Oh well, I’m sure the next 4 years will go even faster.
Here is some video from the party, held at a kid’s gym. A bit much for a kid’s party? Are you kidding? Do you think I’d have that many kids in my house? The video is from the end of the party, where they have the birthday boy put on a crown and hand out the all important goody bags.
Another dad sings about “all the crying and the whining” that’s part of putting kids to bed. I couldn’t have said it any better…
At two months old, Thing 3 is able to smile. It’s a major milestone for parents. This bundle, aka blob, of joy that has done nothing but eat/cry/sleep/poop for two months, is now aware of his surroundings and able to interact with us. Everyone comes up to him now and tries to get him to smile. I wonder, what do babies think when parents try to get them to smile? Are they as amused as us?
When Thing 1 and Thing 2 are in hyper-mode, like after they’ve had a bowl of ice cream and we’re trying to get them to bed, it’s near impossible to calm them down. Sometimes, I play a game where I tell them to give me their “sillies”, and I pretend to put them in my pocket. I tell them I’ll give them back once they get into bed. Believe it or not, it sometimes works. Tonight, I had this exchange with Thing 2
Me: Give me your sillies
Thing 2: No!! (runs out of room with shirt on head)
Me: Ok, I’m taking them (I pretend to swallow them)
At this point, he breaks into hysterics, wailing that he wants his sillies back. He thought I really swallowed them, and he couldn’t be silly anymore. I couldn’t help but laugh. I guess whatever daddy says is believable at this age. I can’t wait to see what happens when I tell him about the boogie man under his bed!
Here’s a brief glimpse into Suburban Daddy’s world. This was last Sunday morning around 8am. Understandably, your first reaction will be oh, how cute. And, taken out of context, I would agree. But imagine this started at 5:45am, and went on all day long. Then imagine it kept repeating, day after day, like the movie Groundhog Day. Yes, welcome to my world.